How To Love Forever

#METOO AND THE MOVIES: Dignity For Actors In The Age Of Accountability + Interview With Megan Gilron, Intimacy Coordinator/Director In Film & TV

IN THIS EPISODE, we go to HOLLYWOOD!
To be more specific, we get intimate with Hollywood!
(To be even more specific, we go to Vancouver)
We learn about how the film industry is evolving its creation and representation of intimacy in movies and TV!
& We get behind-the-scenes peaks in our conversation with a real life intimacy coordinator in the film industry!
had the privilege of conversing with Megan Gilron, intimacy coordinator for film & TV, based in Vancouver. Intimacy coordination is a quite a recent development, stemming pretty directly from the Me Too movement.
Since 2017, demand for the position in film & tv productions has steadily gained traction, to help control workplace misconduct & to help ensure that people aren’t being taken advantage of in what is often an impulsive, high-stakes industry.
Thanks to actor Emily Meade on HBO’s “The Deuce”, the need for choreographing scenes of intimacy of both a sexual nature and a familial or platonic has now become a standard role recognized across the film industry here in the US, in Canada, and Europe.
So we had a great chat with Megan, who is an Intimacy Coordinator/Director and has been instrumental in shaping the future of this new role in filmmaking.  She had so many interesting thoughts to share on the past & future of the film industry & how these changes might be reflected in our relationship to the stories on the silver screen.
(no mint-jalapeño sex lube was used in this production)
Some Links For You:
Our Patreon page:  www.patreon.com/howtoloveforever
Write to us at contact@howtoloveforever.com
Wheel Of Consent by Betty Martin, https://bettymartin.org/videos/
 

PLAYTIME! An Exploration Of Playfulness And Its Role In Happy Relationships

Don’t be so serious! Play, y’all. 
IN THIS EPISODE, we get silly!
We discuss how beneficial play can be within our relationships.
We share the most common ways partners play with each other
& We spill the tea on the secret pet names we have for each other.
So yesterday was Valentine’s day, and in light of this oh-so-romantic holiday, we thought we’d do an episode all about how to make relationships fun!
Do you and your partner(s) get playful with each other? Do you bring silliness in to your daily lives to break up all the mind-numbing mundanity of having to get shit done?
When we think of play, we typically think of children’s pastimes, but the options for adults are pretty limited. We might play video or board games, or enjoy a sport, but our daily lives tend to be fairly serious. What with all the responsibilities we have to manage. 
However play has been shown to be highly beneficial for both our mental & physical health!
General playfulness benefits our lives in all sorts of ways, like reducing our stress, making interactions with others more positive, boosts our creativity, can help us be more physically healthy, and just makes us feel good.But how does it affect our romantic relationships?
So this may come as a surprise… but we love science based research. According to studies we were able to pull up on the web, the research that has been done on play, and specifically play within a romantic structure, suggests that couples who are playful with each other, tend to have deeper & more satisfying relationships. 
And they last longer, too!
 
Here are some links for you to check out:
https://www.primalplay.com/blog/the-top-10-reasons-to-make-time-for-play
https://www.jstor.org/stable/1129507
https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/benefits-of-play-for-adults.htm
https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/what_playfulness_can_do_for_your_relationship
https://spsp.org/news-center/blog/proyer-brauer-playfulness
https://www.psypost.org/2022/01/playful-adults-have-more-have-more-romantic-partners-study-finds-62406
That Study about playful adults having more partners https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/evolutionary-human-sciences/article/adult-playful-individuals-have-more-long-and-shortterm-relationships/C6F025906BD5678DC13F723E5FD6BF77

A Special Little Valentine’s Day Message From Your Favorite Love Nerds

Hoping you *have* much love and *give* much love in 2022!
We have tons of love for you!  Every Tuesday!

SEXUAL LIBERATION, ORGASMIC VISIONS & HUMPING IN SPACE - An Interview With Sexologist Amanda Morgan (pt 2)

IN THIS EPISODE, we share the second part of our interview with TALENTED Sexologist Dr. Amanda Morgan
We dish about our shared time working/volunteering at the Erotic Heritage Museum in Las Vegas. 
She reveals some steamy NASA sex secrets ... SERIOUSLY!
And she tells us about her first time meeting a … ManPuppy!
This is the second half of our fascinating & hilarious interview with sexologist Amanda Morgan, PhD.  It touches on some of the unique topics that only a professional sex educator could share.
So much fun and so many laughs along the way!
 
Some links for your entertainment
www.askdramanda.com 

SEXUAL LIBERATION, HIGHER EDUCATION & THE PLAGUE - An Interview With Sexologist Amanda Morgan (pt 1)

IN THIS EPISODE, we sit down for a talk with groundbreaking Sexologist and educator Amanda Morgan, PhD 
We chat about her experiences as a professor at UNLV, and how the pandemic impacted her and her students’ experience
We cover her formative years and what led her to become the youngest Sexologist in America
We hear about many myths and misconceptions that afflict our society that she has dedicated her life to dispelling.
We discuss the more interesting contents of her closet
We find out how a vagina is like coffee!
 In this episode we share with you part 1 of our 2 part interview with the amazing sexologist, Dr. Amanda Morgan.  Dr Amanda has been our friend for years, but time and circumstance have created some unintended distance between us.  It’s nice to catch up with her again. 
We share the first half of what turned out to be a long & satisfying chat at Dr Amanda’s home.  We talk about the difficulties & challenges of teaching when suddenly the world shuts down.  We chat about how she became infatuated with sex as a topic of study.  We hear examples of how poorly educated in sexual matters we are as a society.  We discuss her collaboration at the old Erotic Heritage Museum in Las Vegas as well as her performance group Dr. Sexpot's Erotic Circus, and we touch on her chosen mission both as an educator and as an artist. 
Part 2 comes out next week! 
Some links: 
www.askdramanda.com
https://www.atlasobscura.com/places/erotic-heritage-museum
https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attraction_Review-g45963-d2490205-Reviews-Erotic_Heritage_Museum_Las_Vegas-Las_Vegas_Nevada.html
 
 

THE COURAGE TO CONNECT - Vulnerability As A Relationship Superpower

IN THIS EPISODE, 
We expose ourselves.  By which we mean we open up about getting vulnerable.
We define what is vulnerability.
We share examples of healthy & unhealthy vulnerability.
We break down the benefits of being vulnerable.
And share with you a handful of ways it can enrich your relationship
Without being needy,
Or a doormat,
Or an inscrutable jerk!
 In today’s episode we are discussing vulnerability, why it’s crucial for healthy relationships, examples of how to be vulnerable, and what vulnerability isn’t.  It’s a difficult habit to engage, and most of us do everything in our power to avoid it, but it helps to make us so much stronger and able to enjoy deeper, more meaningful connections. Vulnerability can be a real super power, one might say!So let’s dive right in.
Brené Brown, Ph.D, LMSW, in her 2012 book Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead, “Vulnerability is the core, the heart, the center, of meaningful human experiences.”    Check out Dr. Brené Brown's book!  https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B007P7HRS4/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=B007P7HRS4&linkCode=as2&tag=howtolovefore-20&linkId=508228a123a9c00979d2fddb44e260ed (it's an affiliate link so if you buy the book it benefits the podcast, win win!)
Dr. Joan Rosenberg's Psychology Today article we mentioned:https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-mastery/202008/how-be-more-vulnerable-and-authentic
Some additional links for your perusal:
https://www.verywellmind.com/fear-of-vulnerability-2671820
https://www.bustle.com/articles/150219-7-ways-to-let-yourself-become-more-vulnerable
https://www.lovepanky.com/my-life/better-life/what-does-it-mean-to-be-vulnerable
https://positivepsychology.com/how-to-be-vulnerable/
 

TRAVEL & PASSION: An Interview With Lover, Poet & Wanderer Christine Jupp

IN THIS EPISODE we enjoy a conversation with writer, poet, & aspiring Antarctic janitor, Christine Jupp.
She shares her perspective on ethical non-monogamy & the importance of being able to travel well with a partner.
We learn what a “glitter gringo” is!
And she gives us goosebumps with a piece of spoken word poetry.
We met Christine through a digital nomad group on FB, and it just turned out to be one of those kismet kind of connections. She is a fellow artist and a traveler in an ENM relationship, with such a lovely perspective to share.
Much like the variety-loving-travelers we all are, our conversation went on a bit of a world tour, touching on her upcoming trip to S. America, to her future goal of working in Antarctica, to the intricacies of maintaining healthy relationships. 
All of that, and amazing poetry! We are excited to share this episode with you!
 
Links for your perusal:
Explore Christine's poetry here:https://vocal.media/authors/christine-jupp
 
Find her on IG:@acornsassquatch
 
Discover your level of kink!:https://sexualalpha.com/bdsm-kink-test/
 
Check out "Sex At Dawn:  How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships", by Christopher Ryan:https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B004ADQAPM/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=B004ADQAPM&linkCode=as2&tag=howtolovefore-20&linkId=0e7e4c592e660bae9efd240b6184282f
 
 

WHAT MESSAGE ARE YOU PUTTING OUT? The 4 Message Types in Relationship Communication

(This is a follow-up episode to Episode 09, The 5 Communication Styles)
IN THIS EPISODE, we explore & define 4 Message Types
We explain the difference between being an analytical, intuitive, functional and personal Message
We see which ones work best with each other and which ones are more challenging to combine in relationships
We share tips on how to get along with each Message type
& We help you pinpoint you & your partners message type
 
www.uky.edu.hr/files/wellness/images/Conf14_FourCommStyles.pdf
 

THE 5 COMMUNICATION STYLES: Can An Office Interactions Model Help Improve Relationships?

IN THIS EPISODE, we explore & define The 5 Communication Styles
We explain the difference between being assertive and being aggressive
We provide tips on how to break out of being passive and get your needs communicated 
We share insight on how to tell if you’re dealing with a manipulative communicator
& We help you pinpoint just what type of communicator you & your partner(s) are
Some online resources for your benefit: 
We came across these articles about the 5 Communications Styles  model
https://www.valamis.com/hub/communication-styles
and
https://www.uky.edu/hr/sites/www.uky.edu.hr/files/wellness/images/Conf14_FourCommStyles.pdf
https://www.workpatterns.com/articles/communication-styles
I think Psychologist Claire Newton describes them best in this cool chart she made:  https://www.clairenewton.co.za/my-articles/the-five-communication-styles.html
The model is geared towards workplace relationships, but we saw that it’s just as applicable towards our romantic ones.   
Tell us what your favorite tacos are and we will know that we aren't just typing all this into an empty void. Leave us your comments about your favorite tacos at contact@howtoloveforever.com and validate our existence!  :-)   Please include your favorite salsa and garnishings and where you get them from!  Yep, I guess we really are hungry!

GENDER IDENTITY IN THE MODERN AGE: An Interview With Sy Bernabei, LGBTQIA+ Warrior

In this episode, we explore the evolving landscape of gender diversity
We take a look at how gender & sexual identities are quickly changing, & how this fast evolution affects individuals, relationships, and society
We inquire about how we, as a pretty average couple, can be an ally to those whose voices need to be heard
We have a long conversation with the multi-pronouned, pan-gendered, and simply awesome Executive Director of a rights-advocacy group for the LGBTQIA+ community
They even teach us what the A stands for!
Here are some online resources for your benefit:
Gender Justice Nevada, an outreach & advocacy organization for the LGBTQIA+ community https://genderjusticenv.org/
What is nonbinary gender?  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Non-binary_gender
The Pronoun "They" can be singular or plural, get over it:  https://www.grammarly.com/blog/use-the-singular-they/
Domestic violence and the queer community  https://ncadv.org/blog/posts/domestic-violence-and-the-lgbtq-community
2021 was a deadly year for the trans community https://www.forbes.com/sites/lakenbrooks/2021/11/14/2021-has-been-a-deadly-year-for-transgender-people/?sh=3d0be1356e8b
40% of homeless teens in the US were kicked out of their homes by their parents after coming out https://lesley.edu/article/the-cost-of-coming-out-lgbt-youth-homelessness
2017, A Newborn Baby is declared nonbinary for the first time:  https://www.kveller.com/a-newborns-gender-was-declared-non-binary-for-the-first-time/
Understanding nonbinaryness:  https://transequality.org/issues/resources/understanding-non-binary-people-how-to-be-respectful-and-supportive
A fun interactive Gender Identity Map  https://www.impactprogram.org/lgbtq-youth/gendermap/
Gender-diverse cultures around the world:  https://www.pbs.org/independentlens/content/two-spirits_map-html/